I’ve studied over 200 kids—parents who raise emotionally intelligent kids do 7 things early on

By verbally exchanging feelings — such as “I’m frustrated” or “I’m happy” — they taught their children emotional awareness and gave them words to express themselves. This helped their children see feelings as normal and share them openly rather than suppressing them.

They showed their child that mistakes are a part of life and that taking responsibility is strength. Apologizing builds trust, shows respect, and makes the child feel valued. She also modeled empathy and taught them how to mend relationships.

This may seem unconventional, but they knew that kindness and respect could not be imposed by force. Instead, they modeled these behaviors, trusting that their child would learn by example. If their child forgot to say thank you, the parent said it, confident that the lesson would stick over time.

This takes a lot of courage! But as a parenting coach, I never ask my 6-year-old to say please or thank you. Now he says it all the time on his own, because he hears me say it.

They took their child’s concerns seriously, whether it was a lost toy or a problem with a friend. By validating their feelings, they show their child that emotions matter. This enhanced their self-esteem, emotional safety and respect for their experiences.

The best way to teach decision making is to encourage children to make their own decisions. Instead of solving problems, they asked: “What do you think we should do?” This has helped to promote critical thinking, confidence and independence.

They let their children get bored, which helped them become comfortable with stillness. This built creativity, self-organization and problem-solving skills. Their child learned to enjoy his own company and find joy in simple moments, like staring out the car window instead of needing a screen.